DH and I have been married for 11 years and share a great camaraderie, having many common interests naturally (including travel, photography, love for nature etc) and others acquired over time due to respect for the partners likes (like wine, coffee, understanding shaolin and star wars!).
Despite being self-sufficient in many ways, we do seek out company of fellow couples (Now, fellow parents) to hang-out with on Saturday nights, unwind, harping about our kids achievements and discuss about other people’s businesses.
We being an easy going, jolly sort of fellas (at least I would like to believe so), still find ourselves on this quest of finding that perfect “couple muse” who would share our “Gouda” (deriving from one such episode of HIMYM, the inspiration behind this article)!
The idea of our perfect couple friends: They should love to come over, at least sometimes, instead of expecting us to lift our tushie and go to their abode always; Appreciate our cooking (which we put a lot of effort into) and at least have some interest in different cuisines; Bring along a bottle of good red (or pour the great wine that we take, to their place instead of their own mediocre one); Their baby, if not an ideal playmate, should at least not be trying to beat up our kid all the time); should enjoy our kinda music which should be Jazz/ soul/ blues/ country; should love wine for the taste and not to get sloshed! The couple should ideally be on the same page with each other it’s just too much work to sort out other people’s differences when all we want is to relax ourselves.
So there I am, having sifted through images in my mind of all our friends and the evenings spent with them, and noting down things that irk us.
The kind of couples that we’ve come across, on this journey, could be broadly sorted, as follows:
- The ones “openly dripping sarcasm”
e.g Wife- “I’ve had enough, now you run after the kid!”
Husband- “a bit of running will do some good for your figure”.
Such friends are plenty, and would always love to catch up as they need to release their vitriolic thoughts on other people. But they are such a drain on our emotional reserves and rather than unwinding ourselves, we end up being more knotted in our brains at the end of the evening!
- The “Limited palate” variety.
e.g. Us- “where can we eat out tonight…there’s this new place with fusion cuisine…”
Them-“ I’ll like to have the same old…same old”…every single time!
What can I say, no common tastes there, literally!
- The “why don’t you come over” variety.
As much of a fun company they might be, a friendship is not on an equal footing, if equal effort to meet is not made by both parties.
- The “Alright couple with that bit of an aggressive kid”
Imagine a great evening in enjoyable company of people also smitten with wanderlust, comparing trips to south of France or Cambodia; flow of delicious wine; soulful melodies of Patsy cline playing in the background. Then just as we began to loosen up; the harmony is broken by the cry of our dear little darling who has been flattened to the ground …and all we can think, why…Oh why…?!
- The “Envious varietals”
Of, course this variety can hardly be called friends, because friends can’t be spiteful or green-eyed. They are the ones who don’t call so much now as they used to earlier, always faking a smile when you do meet, always making comparisons, projecting themselves the busiest in the world, belittling their friends, while in their hearts, they can’t stop wishing they could swap positions.
- The “Long distance relationship”
The “very near to perfection” kind of couple, who are fun loving, great buddies, well settled in their personal and professional lives…but who unfortunately move base and shift to other states. What’s the point of them in the world if they are not available every other weekend!
- The “Annoying Flaunters”
We all know those…who brag the most, have been everywhere and done it all, know everything and everyone etc..etc… I don’t think I need to say more.
There are such lucky couples in this world who share great interpersonal bonding and are nearly self-sufficient as far as company goes, and don’t really need other people too much!
There are those who have great couple friends, but they don’t always have a harmonious personal life.
The fortuitous ones are those who have found both a great life partner and great friends!
But truly blessed are those, who not only have perfect life partners, have Ideal couple friends but also have the best playmate for their child- Pura Vida!
P.S. I am being too adventurous here, and am hoping this article will be buried somewhere beneath the gazillion bytes of data on the internet, not reaching any of our “not so perfect” but all very precious friends. If you, my friend have nonetheless, ventured upon this article, let me declare that we understand we’re not perfect either…and just for laughs, you could try to categorise “us” in these or any of your own categories!
This post, as mentioned earlier, was inspired by an episode of HIMYM, which was too hilarious and true to be ignored…and got me thinking…and then finally writing…and then couldn’t help sharing!